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Regarding Carlus

Posted: Thu Mar 18, 2010 3:08 pm
by Arev
Posted in the RP forums:

I don't want drama. I just want to clarify.

The sole purpose I left most beloved RID is because a certain guy named Beached voiced extremely derogatory and discriminating opinions towards women in general. I am adamant in that I will never share guild tag with someone who apparently voices said things - be they directed towards women, foreigners, people of different color or whatever.

I love you all. Well, all but one. But I am afraid I will not be part of any organization that such people are in. Do with it as you please.

Carlus


My response:

Carlus, I am sorry to see you go. I beg you to please reconsider and trust the RID leadership to handle the situation accordingly.

We need all the roleplayers we can get, frankly, and you are an invaluable asset to us--damn fine roleplayer, great PvPer, coupled with a great sense of humor (plus a killer accent).

Please, I ask you to reconsider.

Thank you.


Honestly, the humor was killed immediately when he /guildr'd.

Since Lexx and Ramd weren't there, I'll recap from what I know, Red will have to fill in the beginning I caught the end of it.

Carlus and Beached (alt of TK-NineTwoOne) disagreed about Paris Hilton. Beached called her a "slut" and Carlus believes that no woman, famous or not, should be called that. Beached insisted that she only acquired her fame because of her sexuality. Carlus insisted on his point. Eventually, he jumped ship and put Beached on ignore.

I don't necessarily believe that Beached was entirely in the wrong, but both had been drinking and it became heated quickly. Gilie sent me a tell saying that Beached appears to be the "cliche American a-hole" and I counted with "And Carlus the stereotypical elitist European intellectual". Either way, I don't believe the situation is irreconcilable. To be honest, I should have stepped in and broke it up ages ago.

Posted: Thu Mar 18, 2010 6:08 pm
by Ramd
Not another drama flare-up. /facepalm

I'm sorry I haven't been around much, I've been traveling a lot lately. I should have more free time on Friday and the weekend.

About this, I think we just need to sit down with both parties and let them vent. Chances are, everything will cool down and we can coax Carlus back in. I don't think Beached's comments were too bad, maybe a little questionable, but since he wasn't using the term directed at anyone in the guild, I don't think we need to make a big deal about it.

I'd suggest sitting down with Beached and telling him to be a bit more tactful around people who may not feel similarly.

And for the record, I'm an American too, and I don't think I'm an "a-hole" :)

Posted: Fri Mar 19, 2010 6:54 pm
by Lexx Yovel
Let me guess, Carlus is Paris Hilton's father?

In all seriousness, I don't know what Carlus got upset about. From what it sounded like, Beached was just ridiculing one celebrity, not an entire gender. All Beached should be chided for is using the word slut in guild chat, if nothing else.

Of course, I may need to get my eyes on an actual chat log of the incident. Mistur sent me a PM, and he said what unfolded was Beached making fun of Britney Spears, and this eventually devolved to Beached calling all women whores.

So as you can see, stories vary considerably, and we may need to get screenshots of the incident, or speak with other members about what had happened,

In the meantime, I will speak to Carlus. It's a shame to see him go, and I think we really need him back. I want to let him know that we'll sort out this issue to the best of our ability.

Like you said Ramd, I think sitting down both Beached and Carlus would be a good idea. Beached needs to learn to be a bit more tactful, and we need to let him know this.

Well, before I submit, how is everything else in RID? Has anyone else left RID as a result of this incident? Have any other members joined?

Well, I look forward to seeing you all Sunday :)

Posted: Sat Mar 20, 2010 5:28 pm
by Red-Dawn
I was there and i was part of the conversation ... The deal was only for Paris Hilton and everyone as there opinion, not becasue Beached says that Paris is a bitch that mean he thinks all woman are bitches.

Personnally, i think Carlus overreacted.

Posted: Sun Mar 21, 2010 11:00 am
by Lexx Yovel
If what you say is true Red, and all Beached did was make fun of Paris Hilston -- then I agree, Carlus overreacted.

Honestly, I'm not sure how, or if we can get him back to RID.

Here is the PM I sent to him:

Hey Carlus!

I don't have much time to write, so here is just a brief statement.

I learned of what has happened, and we are all saddened to see you go. We sincerely hope that you reconsider your decision, and rejoin RID, because you are a very valued RID member.

You must trust that myself and the rest of the leadership will investigate the issue, and resolve it in the best possible manner.

I look forward to returning Sunday, and hope to speak with you some more then.

Thanks,
Lexx Yovel

And his response is as follows:

Hey mate. Thanks for the kind words!

I want to be in RID - but I just want to stress that I want no drama at all, especially not on my account. You know how it is, I don't have enough rl time to dabble with e-drama

Thus I just prefer not being in guild if being in guild causes drama for anybody if you understand what I mean, mate. But I do want to be in RID - RID is the place I like

And to the initial reason... I'm usually very laid back with everything. I'm probably the last guy to be PC about everything. But... I really don't take kindly to such derogatory and discriminating talk. If it's joking that's one thing, but this wasn't. And it's not very nice in my opinion.

Carl

Posted: Sun Mar 21, 2010 12:15 pm
by Red-Dawn
He doesn't like drama but he started the drama !!!

Hmmm interesting

Posted: Sun Mar 21, 2010 2:09 pm
by Lexx Yovel
Well after discussing the issue with you in-game Red, I do not believe that Beached is at fault.

I believe Carlus overreacted, and that the whole situation was taken out of context by some members who were not even there. Carlus was drunk (though Beached admits he was too -- Who wasn't, it was St. Patrick's day), so I believe that played a part.

Overall, I find it interesting that Carlus is now in a guild called the Russia Corps. It's possible he wanted to find a reason to leave RID to join another guild.

Either way, I do not think Carlus will be returning. But at least we can keep on good terms with him, in case he decided to change his mind.

Posted: Sun Mar 21, 2010 3:49 pm
by Ramd
yeah, it sounds to me like he was looking for an excuse to leave. Most people don't just /guildr themselves because of one incident.

Posted: Mon Mar 22, 2010 1:01 pm
by Arev
Interesting. Well, just have to keep our eyes open.