Post
by Barney » Sat Apr 12, 2008 12:32 pm
I received two tells of complaints about the immaturity of our guild members from Astocia before she even joined RID, once against 'Aresius' and once against Redaxxe.
I asked Lexx about the issue with 'Aresius' and he looked into it and seemed to feel it was a non issue. I asked her if she had issues with RID members that she was to screenshot and forward them to me or any other officer and we would look into them, and that's how we did things. She declined and instead pestered me with tells about all her "doubts" about our guild because she felt it was too immature for her.
I feel she came into our guild with a negative attitude and that attitude won't change toward our guild. Regardless of how bad the ISD group went it was not a guild event, it didn't even have 50% guild members in the group, and yet she's held our guild to blame for how it went wrong in her eyes. I dislike that quickness to lump us all together as all bad because she had one bad encounter with one guild member. We are a large group of people and I like to see SOME effort to make compromises and get along with people we don't like, before people start flinging around threats and /guildremoves.
I specifically asked her to let us officers handle it, and at least give all of you time to review the screenshots and she didn't even give us that respect or courtesy. She had her chance but she failed to prove to US that she is any more mature than the people she had complaints against.
'Aresius' is one of our "kids". He spends most his time with the other "kids" in the guild. They have their own way of talking and getting along that is unique to video games, they talk leetspeak constantly make jokes, kid around, pretend argue, joke about nasty sex things (yeah like Lamid and I don't snicker and joke in guild chat late at night?) and of course, natural for their age, are centered on what they get out of their game and what's in it for them.
I don't agree with some of his leetspeak attitudes and he comes close to demeaning other guild members for not being "uber" or soloing things he can or whatever, but at the same time, he's been told to shut up and he does. He made a small slight comment that seemed like it would offend people in guild chat yesterday afternoon and I very gently tapped him on the nose and reminded him that not everyone is a bad player just because they can't solo stuff like he can, and he backed down immediately and did not take that little scoffing any further at all.
He was told not to bring up the drama with Astocia in guild chat and he did. He went out of his way and spent a good time with me and his group to try to talk to me about what went wrong. Did I like his opinions? No. The crap about women pmssing took a lotta balls to tell ME rofl. OMG I could not decide if he was incredibly BRAVE or incredible STUPID!! LOL. But did he make an honest try? Yes he did, a lot more honest and less full of attitude than Astocia did. I dislike how Astocia tried to force me into policing a private group's actions, or to hold me responsible for it. That was a wrong view to take on a casual group.
I think Astocia should be let go. We don't owe her an apology, she never even gave us the courtesy to let us try to mediate this disagreement for her, and she went into our guild with already prejudiced views.
I think adults in this game need to learn we share the game with kids, we have OTHER adults. Sure, we're sending a strong message lately that we won't take drama and outright bickering dragged into the guild. We ALSO need to send the message that just plain prejudice against people who play or talk different in the guild is also not acceptable. If the kids bother you man, play with the adults. I see no reason why we can't have the best of both worlds in RID. I SURE don't see the supposedly less mature players constantly pestering me with tells bitching about the older players.
I am really not sure that we have any right to discipline 'Aresius' in any way over the group. It was HIS group, and we DID agree how people run their groups with their own friends is THEIR business, not RID business. I saw him actually try to make an effort to be nice and compromise with her, and I also see she and other friends of hers she brought into our RID group the night before last did like looting things they didn't even need. I was given that complaint against her by Shadowheart, but because I was not running the group, and Ody had handed leadership to her and her friends she'd added as pick ups, there was really nothing I had a right to say about it. This bothers me, I gave her the courtesy to run her group and looting how she wanted and let her friends loot stuff they didn't need, but the minute it looked like she could not use the lotto system even though offered a fair roll still she freaked out? That seemed, um... unbalanced.
In a way, if you think about it, 'Aresius' was doing exactly what any Officer in an official RID group would do, "hey you are rolling on lotto for things you don't even need for your character, and other people in group do need it on their character so I'm switching to Master and we can roll real in game dice for it" that's RIGHT THERE in RID policies if we have a problem looter in our groups. Sure he was a verbal nut about it and they went too far but he DID try to do the right thing the nice way first before she started flinging her ultimatums and threats to the group.
I'm not happy with 'Aresius' and actually have declined to group with him just because his way of talking and playing is too uberleet like for me, but I'm not sure this issue is worth kicking him over. Do I think it should count toward any future issues that might come up? Yea. Do I think we should spy on him relentlessly? yeah lol.